Tuesday, July 28, 2009

what is it that makes it so hard to talk to each other....

communication is the exchange of thoughts, messages, information, feelings and ideas with others. It is vital for us to have good communication skills in other to adapt in whatever situations we are for instance in school, the way we communicate with our friends is certainly different with teachers.
However there are several factors that cause difficulties for some people to talk to each others.

First of all, different ages or generations make people feel so hard to share something. Why is it so???? This is because the young will think differently and experience different stories with the older generations. From the story of THOUSAND YEARS OF GOOD PRAYERS, we can see that the father, the main character is able to talk with madam which is almost the same age with him. Although sometime they communicate in different languages they can understand each other very well, if we compared with the interaction between the father and yilan, his own daughter. I myself can see the awkward situation between them whenever they start to talk to each other. This also happen In the real world, In my view young people nowadays prefer to have conversation with their friends rather than to tell the problems with their own parents as they may think that parents will not understand them well.

It is undeniable that distance can causes people not to close to each other. Yilan and her father live separately for a long time. She is in America while Mr shi is in china. Thus, when they meet and stay together they are unable to interact with each other like a father and a daughter used to be. I have also seen this happen to one of my friends. Her family used to live far away since she was in form 3 and it is long time for her not to see her parents even she celebrated Hari Raya with her aunt's family. she has told me that whenever her dad called her , she will feel the gap between them , the conversation between them has changed, not the same as when they live together long time ago. I would say that she is really a strong girl. Well done my friend!!!.

The reluctance to share and to talk is also one of the reasons. for instance, in the story, Yilan refuse to tell her father what was going on with her marriage, what are the reasons of the divorce in spite of mr shi has tried so hard to persuade her daughter to open her mouth, yet to tell him why she is unhappy. however, in my opinion the refusal of yilan to give out her problems is because of Mr shi himself." you didn’t talk much about anything "Yilan told this when her father asked her about her unhappiness and this clearly showed that yilan did the same thing as her father did when they used to live together in china. This is like a revenge of Yilan to her father.

In order to break the emotional war, both individuals should understand each other well, to feel comfortable with people we talk; we should know other's backgrounds more and are willing to express our feeling. I believe that when we share something with others, sense of relief will emerge in our hearts and thus make us feel that we are not alone in this world. If we are unsatisfying with something, we should say it and not to keep it in our heart, however it would be better to say it in a proper way without killing others feeling. Sometimes people may say that it would be better for us to keep silent than talking but actually it depends on the circumstances. The most significant thing is THINK FIRST BEFORE TALKING....,by doing this people will respect you more.....